21.4.12

DAVID VAN MARLEN: B-MOVIE DRINKING GAME

B-Movie Drinking Game: Hard Ticket To Hawaii


What do you, oh savvy hipster, do when there’s no Subbacultcha! gig lined up on a particular eve? Sure, you watch a movie. But not just any regular flick, no; there’s nothing better than staying in character with an awful yet hilarious B-movie from a few decades ago.

These movies are enjoyed most when in the company of friends and with alcohol flowing freely. Friends you hopefully have, but Subbacultcha! will help you with the latter in the shape of a series of drinking games, matching expertly selected full length films. The first movie in the series is ‘Hard Ticket to Hawaii’, a 1987 flick filled with scantily clad Playboy Playmates, Eurobaddies, a robot snake and ‘The Bold and the Beautiful’s iron-jawed Ridge Forrester. Everything you ever wanted in a film, in other words; watch out for the outrageous death scenes throughout the movie.

Watch the movie (embedded below for your convenience) and follow these simple rules for a night’s worth of hilarity and liver torture. You can play the drinking game with the traditional liquor shots, but that’s mostly for experienced drinkers; taking gulps of beer at every cue should get you well underway too. Here goes:
- Drink for every gratuitous boob shot (that would be every boob shot)
- Drink for every dick joke
- Drink for every snake appearance
- Drink for every terrible Bruce Lee-imitation (ie. every Bruce Lee-imitation)
- Drink for every bazooka shot
- Drink for every death by Frisbee. Sadly, this doesn’t happen nearly often enough.

The following morning might not be so hot, but you’ll be having the time of your life Patrick Swayze-style for the full 90 minutes of this movie, and most probably a while after it has ended too. Enjoy!


David van Marlen also blogs highly irregularly as De Maltese Valk and is the co-founder of Krepvest, a recurring event of B-movie double bills in OT301, for that full-on collective B-movie appreciation experience.